Monday, May 15, 2006
lately it's been like, what is the point of life. what is the reason for why we are all here on this damn planet? practically everything in life hurts. the experiences, the processess of whatever shit you're forced through, everything. i mean, come on. even a masochist has limits. there come a point when it's like, what the fuck, who gives a damn if you go on or give up anyway? a few years after your death everyone's just going to forget you anyway. attend the funeral, play some requiem, shed a few tears, and then life goes on. back to normal. no shit. so what if you fall apart too soon. not supposed to? too damn bad.

i wonder why people want a painless death. you spend your whole life afraid of pain, you're hiding from it, you avoid it for chrissakes. so doesn't it make more sense to at least experience some pain before you die? not like the pain will last for eternity anyway. it'll stop at some point. and then you can leave this earth knowing you've faced up to one of your fears.

then again, that's just me. some people prefer a painless death. cause they want to leave the earth happy? possibly wanting to feel truly happy or at least at peace for the first time in their life before leaving. no idea. whatever pleases you, though.


memory is a curse. i'd rather have my memory wiped blank for some time periods.